Cosmic Correspondent Kim Rogers-Gallagher has been invited to the planets'
secret hangout. She's the first astrologer to enter this starry domain,
and reports regularly on her findings there.
Jupiter Does Battle with Saturn
cat Zuni came and sat on my lap while the tape rewound. Mercury perched
on the edge of my couch, his eyes darting all over the apartment. I
could tell he was running a "scan" on it, making mental notes
and taking in every detail.
ya," I said, smiling. "Gathering information?"
and crossed his hands. "Yeah, you got me there. It's a non-stop
job, girlfriend. I mean, what if one of the Big Guys wants to know something?
It's not like I can tell 'em I don't know. Besides, I just got into
this Scorpio mood last week, and it comes naturally. I just automatically
look for clues, no matter where I am. Comes in handy sometimes, you
that something had changed about Mercury from the moment he walked through
my door. When last I'd seen him, he was in charming Libra, wearing a
perfectly-matched suit. Now he was all done up in black—Scorpio's signature
wait, it's ready." He jumped up, hit “play” and sat back down.
did you ever get this on tape? Didn't they know you were filming?"
smiled devilishly and pulled out a tiny camera from his shirt pocket.
"Nope. Nobody saw a thing." Of course not. Scorpio planets
were masters at operating from behind the scenes. Look at Hillary
Clinton, a Sun-sign Scorpio. Even when she wasn't "doing"
anything, everyone thought she was.
went on. "Hey, they don't call me the trickster for nothing. And
Jupiter wouldn't have seen me, anyway. Man, was he mad!"
I bit my
lip and stroked Zuni nervously, hoping that Jupiter hadn't gotten us
both in even bigger trouble than we were apparently already in.
started, but the argument was already in progress. Jupiter was standing
across the table from Saturn, who sat quietly in the corner of the Café,
arms crossed stubbornly, a rigid look on his face. He was in full military
regalia, complete with hat, ribbons and a chest full of medals. Despite
the fact that there was something about the quiet power he exuded that
appealed to my Venus in Capricorn—maybe the fact that she just loved
men in uniforms—I had to admit it. I didn't like this guy. I began to
wish again for the Native American grandmother who had been so protective
and understanding. Where had she gone?
were interrupted by Jupiter's voice. Jupiter's raised voice.
Yee-ha. I was very, very glad I had never seen him angry. I don't know
if I'd ever even known he could get angry. I began to feel a
bit like Guinevere, with a war being fought over little old me.
is it, Saturn. I've had it with you and your discipline!" Jupiter
pounded the table with his huge fist, sending a glass of wine off onto
the floor, where it shattered.
do go on," Saturn said. "It's just wonderful to see
you at your best."
Sarcasm. One of Saturn's favorite weapons.
start with me, pal. I'm not in the mood for your wise-ass comments."
it's obvious that you're not fond of anything wise," said
Saturn, never taking his eyes from Jupiter's. "What a shame that
you can't control your language—but then, control isn't exactly your
strong suit, is it? And all that garbage about you being in charge of
higher learning is just that. You're not in charge of anything—not even
face turned just about purple. "Don't talk to me about my temper,
Saturn, or my language. I'm just getting started here, and you don't
want to push me too far. And you can say what you want about me—I'm
used to it. At least I don't pick on mortals who don't deserve it!"
a matter of opinion, Jupiter. And why does everything I do have to be
so terrible? Doesn't anyone ever have to tend to their responsibilities?
Don't you think she needed to sit still for a little while? What about
her career? What about that damned cat of hers? Who's going to feed
him if she doesn't work for a living? Who's going to pay her rent?"
cat of mine? That damned cat? Mercury glanced over at me,
raised his eyebrows, and made a comic face.
sat down, cocked his head menacingly, and squinted. He pointed a finger
straight at Saturn's unsmiling face. "Hey, I told you before. I
take care of my girl. She'll never go hungry!"
raised his hands slightly, and began to clap. Slowly. "Good. Great.
Bravo. Let's teach her that she doesn't have to do anything at all,
just ask her Uncle for another favor."
lookit, Saturn," Jupiter countered. "That's wrong. She's never
asked for more than a parking spot. Whatever I give her, I give
perhaps you should give her some ambition," Saturn said, "instead
of spoiling her."
me? Well, yes, the trip to Europe had been rather extravagant—but I
didn't think I'd taken unfair advantage of Jupiter's generosity. I realized
I wasn't stroking Zuni any more—I was rubbing him fast enough to make
his fur stand up, electrically charged. He looked up at me, decided
this wasn't working for him and hopped down. Mercury laughed, and called
him over. "What a show, huh, girlfriend?"
really loses his temper.