Cosmic Correspondent Kim Rogers-Gallagher has been invited to the planets'
secret hangout. She's the first astrologer to enter this starry domain,
and reports regularly on her findings there.
Thanksgiving Dinner at the Café—Part II
Café door blew open, and a striking, barefoot god entered. He was wearing
his traditional stiffly starched white toga, and he hadn't bothered
to do anything to his unruly hair, beard or bushy eyebrows.
Moon was in Scorpio, and not in the mood for this. "Sit down,
Uranus. You're late."
enough, the God of Rebellion minded his manners, and sat down.
the dinner went along well. The Sun in Sag kept most of his attention
on the television set, watching the game intently. The Moon and
Neptune kept our plates and glasses full, and Jupiter, obviously our self-ordained
entertainment committee, told jokes and stories. Pluto and his date
didn't participate much—it was obviously tough for them to concentrate
on anything but the sexual magnetism between them. Venus, in her elegant
Capricorn gown, nibbled discreetly on her meal, and chatted quietly
with Mars in Libra, the perfect gentleman. Uranus barely ate. He was
far more interested in playing with the silverware, and making strange
gadgets from it. Mercury in Scorpio was obsessing on the election, and
brought it up whenever he could—despite the fact that the
Moon in Scorpio was sending him dirty looks I knew I wouldn't mess around with.
Saturn didn't say a word. He sat silent and rigid, eating slowly, and chewing
dinner was finished, I was absolutely stuffed. The Moon and Neptune
cleared the table and disappeared into the kitchen. I looked around
the table at my wonderful companions. The candlelight cast fabulous
shadows, and I realized I had a lot to be thankful for.
the kitchen door opened again, and the Moon appeared—with a birthday
cake, blazing with candles. I assumed this was for the Sun—until she
set it down in front of me and the whole gang began clapping.
hugged me, hard, as per. "Happy birthday, babe! You didn't think
we'd forget, did you?"
I was stunned.
The planets had remembered my birthday—November 26. "Count 'em,
babe," Jupiter said. "43, right?"
Wasn't it only ten minutes ago that I had been 26? "Yep. 43."
Capricorn understood my feelings immediately, and reached a gloved hand
over to pat mine. "It's all right, darling. You're not getting
older, you're getting better." She winked knowingly at me, as Mars
stood and presented me with a huge bouquet of roses—43 of them. He kissed
my cheek and returned to Venus' side.
candles, babe—get the candles," Jupiter said. I made a wish, and
blew out the candles—first shot. Then Jupiter jumped up. "It's
time for presents!" Mercury ran into the kitchen and came back
with several huge, beautifully-wrapped boxes.
teared up. In all my 43 years, I'd never had a surprise birthday party.
This was truly wonderful.
placed the boxes on the dinner table and handed Jupiter an envelope,
which he then presented to me. "Open it, babe!" Jupiter said.
"I'm just dyin' to see if you like what I got you!" Ah, yes.
Jupiter in Gemini. If the King of the Gods was already known for his
impatience—and for his inability to keep a secret—in Gemini, he had
to be literally busting at the seams.
given me a photo of a gorgeous racehorse, running at top speed. The
white fence that surrounded his field stood out in stark contrast to
his powerful blue-black body. "He's beautiful," I said to
Jupiter. "I'll frame this."
at me, and said, "You don't get it, do you, babe?"
yours—a retired racer. His name is Jonathan Swift."
I was touched.
I actually started to cry. I hugged Jupiter hard, and said, "Thank
you so very much. I've always wanted a horse of my own."
know," he said, grinning proudly.
mine next," Saturn said, quietly. The whole table fell silent.
Mercury handed me a small package, then ducked quickly into the kitchen.
"gift-box" was dark green, with a bough of evergreen as decoration.
Inside, I found a calculator and a year's supply of calcium tablets.
I grinned at him. The Old Nay-Sayer was trying to apologize for breaking
my ankle. "Thank you, Saturn," I said.
burst out of the kitchen. "Wait a sec, girl! He got you something
else!" He wheeled a state-of-the-art office-chair toward me—and
halfway across the floor, apparently couldn’t resist the temptation.
He hopped on and rolled merrily toward me.
Saturn bellowed. Mercury hopped quickly out of the chair, a feigned
look of terror on his face.
you so very much," I said, and rose to hug Saturn.
up his hand. "That's not necessary. I just wanted you to have something
sensible that was good for your body."
I sat back
down. For the next half-hour, I opened a variety of boxes, all done
up according to the "tastes" of the planet who'd given the
gift. Pluto's was black, of course, wrapped in gold ribbon with a bright
red bow on the center. Inside, I found a tiny, lacy Victoria's Secret
lingerie set. Jupiter, of course, made me hold it up, but Venus and
I couldn't look. We just giggled. Neptune's box contained bubble bath,
champagne, scented candles and a wonderful pillow designed for the bathtub.
Uranus gave me a new computer I just knew was the absolute cutting-edge
best—and a tape of thunderstorms, my favorite thing about that unpredictable
god. Mercury's gifts were electronic, too—but there was a bit of Scorpio
in there, too. He gave me a DVD player, and a complete set of films
based on Poe, Stephen King and Sherlock Holmes stories.
in Sag presented me regally with his box, containing a world atlas,
a pair of hiking boots and a round-trip ticket to Egypt, saying, "You've
always wanted to see the pyramids, haven't you?"
gifts were, of course, comforting ones. She'd chosen a plush black,
red and gold comforter, a huge box of herb tea, a bathrobe and big fuzzy
gift came last. It was wrapped as elegantly as the goddess was dressed,
and held an evening gown identical to hers, a set of pearl earrings,
a strand of pearls and two tickets to The Phantom of the Opera—for
that very evening. I hugged her, and said, "Who's going with me?
smiled mischievously. Jupiter cleared his throat. Then the door to the
Café opened, and an absolutely gorgeous tall, dark-haired man came in.
He wore a police captain's dress uniform, and came directly to my chair.
"That would be me. I'm your blind date."
I exchanged glances—and a silent message. What was more attractive than
a man in a uniform to Venus in Capricorn? I hugged her, and thanked
them all, as my date pulled out my chair and took my arm.
too late!" Saturn warned, shaking his long, bony finger.
just have a great time, babe," Jupiter said. "I'll handle
old Dr. No."
to the door in time to hear the argument starting. Saturn was telling
Jupiter I had work to do, Jupiter was arguing that birthdays only come
once a year and Venus was laughing happily. I was, too.
Week: The planets discuss the election, and the Moon begins decorating.